Devil’s Tower 2014 Quick Review…

Devil’s Tower is a story about an abused teen who moves into an old apartment complex only to find that some of the inhabitants have gone missing and a vengeful, zombie creating ghost is responsible.

Look, I’m not going to say this movie is horrible. It’s pretty much what you expect from any film that stars Jason Mewes that isn’t directed by Kevin Smith. His acting is not good in this. Once you get past that, his character is likeable and at times humorous in the shallowest of ways. Roxanne Pallett however is a breath of fresh air in this otherwise boring film.

Devil’s Tower is pretty much a snoozefest until the last 15 minutes. I almost stopped watching at a couple of points. First, the opening credits. It seemed like they went on for hours. I don’t mind getting the main credits in first but in this case they just seemed to go on and on. Ain’t nobody got time for that! The second thing, was something the talented and beautiful Roxanne Pallett’s character Sarah did. In order to understand her characters stupidity in this scene I need to set the stage a bit. She lives in a shitty area, in a shitty building and never seems to lock her door. She doesn’t lock her door when she first moves in and a Kate, her neighbor just walks on in. Another time, Sarah comes home to discover intruders. For the near final straw came not five minutes after that she leaves her door open again! I mean for fuck sakes woman! How am I supposed to care about someone that goddamn stupid? I will tell you how, because the makers of the film know that the only people watching this movie are going to be stoned or they’re going to be fat and lonely bastards like myself that are going to continue to watch, just because no matter how stupid Sarah was, Roxanne Pallett is too cute and sooner or later someone is going to show their boobs. It’s sad but true.

Devil's Tower's Cast | Jason Mewes, Roxanne Pallett, Jessica-Jane Stafford's wonderful butt and Emma Buckley

Devil’s Tower’s Cast | Jason Mewes, Roxanne Pallett, Jessica-Jane Stafford’s wonderful butt and Emma Buckley

So yes, Devils Tower is in fact a bad horror movie. Who would enjoys this movie? People that are stoned. As for the lonely pervs such as my self, not so much. But, let’s say you have things to do like catch up on social media or do some reading, keep the movie on and look up when you hear screaming or moaning.

 

Cast of Characters:
Jason Mewes as Sid
Roxanne Pallett as Sarah MacColl
Frances Ruffelle as Kim
Jessica Jane Clement as Kate
Jessica Ann Bonner as Beverly
Holly Henderson
Eddie Webber as Carnacki
Emma Buckley as Lucy