Rosewood Lane 2011…
Rosewood Lane “When radio talk show psychiatrist, Dr. Sonny Blake, moves back to her hometown, she takes notice of her neighborhood paper boy’s unusual behavior” – Unknown
Well, that doesn’t tell us much. Sadly, neither does this movie. There’s several well known actors in this movie including the leading lady, Rose McGowan who plays the radio Dr. and Ray Wise who plays the Detective investigating the complaints that are made by McGowan’s character Dr. Blake about the neighborhood’s strange paper boy.
This movie keeps things vague. Is this paper boy something supernatural? Is he just crazy? And, what’s with the dogs always chasing him out of the neighbor hood. You see all things could make for an interesting movie if they eventually pay off but they don’t. There comes a point in the film where you feel like you should have an idea what’s going by now with this kid. And, by kid I mean older teenager. The fact that you don’t know what’s going on by that late in the film it stops being interesting and becomes frustrating instead.
Rosewood Lane is filled with all the things I like in a movie. Good acting, it’s well made but the story is just week. It’s never made clear what in the hell is going on. Instead, we just spend the whole time being frustrated that there’s nothing anything can seem to do about this kid. The neighborhood fears him and think his some kinda unnatural being. So many unanswered questions. Top that off with the characters doing some really stupid things and you want to just stop watching it but you’ve already put so much time into it that you figure you might as well just ride it out and hope for some clarity at the end. Then it ends and now you’re mad you didn’t stop watching it 30 minutes ago.
One of those unanswered questions is WTF is going on with the dogs? Several times in the movie the paper boy is chased out of the neighborhood by neighborhood dogs. Somehow these dogs are suddenly all able to get out of their houses and backyards to chase this kid off. But, then we later find that the paper boy killed Dr. Blake’s father’s dog in some horrible fashion as a warning to him. So that had me scratching my head wondering why do he let the dogs run him off if he’s not really afraid of them as we are led to believe?
Even The Actors Need A Drink To Make It Through This Movie
The movie just isn’t put together well. There’s plots that go nowhere. Characters making really stupid decisions. It gets frustrating. All the great actors, a good director (Victor Salva who directed Jeepers Creepers) and they just couldn’t make this film work because it doesn’t matter how good everyone is if the writing is bad, good actors aren’t going to make it better. I think everyone making the film new there were holes in it but hoped it would somehow add some mystery to the whole thing. It didn’t. It simply is a bad horror movie.
Cast Of Characters:
Rose McGowan as Sonny Blake
Daniel Ross Owens as Derek Barber/Paperboy
Lauren Vélez as Paula Crenshaw
Sonny Marinelli as Barrett Tanner
Lesley-Anne Down as Dr. Cloey Talbot
Ray Wise as Det. Briggs
Tom Tarantini as Det. Sabatino
Steve Tom as Glenn Forrester
Lin Shaye as Mrs. Hawthorne
Bill Fagerbakke as Hank Hawthorne
Rance Howard as Fred Crumb
Judson Mills as Darren Summers