Sharkansas Women’s Prison Massacre 2016 A Quick Review…

Sharkansas Women’s Prison Massacre is about prehistoric sharks that get released from beneath the earth’s crust after fracking accident. The target a group of women that have escaped from prison who have become trapped in a cabin in the woods.

Anyone that knows me, knows that I love these kinds of movies. But, even I will admit that I didn’t have high hopes for this movie. To my surprise, it was fun. Some of the acting was weak at times but the special effects, the CGI sharks were some of the best CGI I’ve seen a while. I was expecting really shitty sharks. These things were pretty sweet. I mean there was decent detail. This is just a fun ride. I enjoyed this more than Sharknado.

My only real complaints are as follows. It teases you sexuality and never delivers. No hunky guys shirtless, no topless women. It’s an issue. Let’s be honest you expect it when you read the title. All the women walk around in the skimpiest of clothes while the guys are fully covered up. It’s not that am mad there wasn’t nudity. I am just saying that this particular film would have played better had it delivered everything it promises. The violence is mild in that it any gore you see happens after the fact, The blood sometimes looked like some weird, bright red concoction that was completely unrealistic. But hey, it’s movie about prehistoric sharks so it’s I cut it some slack.

However, like I said, it was fun ride. Sure, I will never watch it again. But, if you got 90 minutes to kill and you generally like these kinds of movies, then this will be slightly better than what you’re expecting and you should pick it up on DVD or Blu-ray. If you don’t like these kinds of movie, there is nothing in this movie that is going to change your mind, I would avoid it. So at the end of the day I have to say I’m on the bubble with this. I had fun watching it but I realize most people won’t.


Traci Lords … Detective Kendra Patterson

Dominique Swain … Honey
Cindy Lucas … Anita Conners
Christine Nguyen … Michelle Alika
John Archer Lundgren … White-Haired Bandit
John Callahan … Carl
Amy Holt … Shannon Hastings
Skye McDonald … Sarah Mason
Corey Landis … Detective Adam Levine
Chris De Christopher … Prof. Orville
Tabitha Marie … Samantha
Oscar DeRosa … John Raden
Steve Goldenberg … Sam
Serafin Falcon … Mike